Archive for Christmas

Ham, I Am

Posted in Alphabetfiend, Art & Culture, Goof & Glamour, In Celebration of the Absurd, Top 2% of Coolest Mofos with tags , , , , , , , , , on September 15, 2010 by alphabetfiend

It was Christmas Eve and we were stuffing stockings.

I’d brought a big pack of butcher shop stickers, from the store. Mom opened the pack and began passing them out amongst the family members.

Rack of ribs for Sutton, a slab of bacon for Sky.

She held up the big, pink, bone-in ham, “Who gets the ham?” she asked and the normally quite Robot piped up.

“Dia!” he exclaimed, like DUH!

And everybody laughed and laughed, including me.

Yep. Ham, I am.

Painting by Mark Ryden. Go to his website, where you will be filled with an unbearable longing, thinking to yourself “How can I hurry up and get rich so’s I can someday afford a Ryden???”

Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!

Posted in Dork Alert, I Heart Friends, I Heart Holidays, I Heart My Love-Tribe with tags , , , , , , , on December 11, 2008 by alphabetfiend
Ever since it started snowing on wordpress my heart has been aching for some real white stuff.  Being that I now live in Austin, Texas my wish for some Christmasy powder was rather improbable. But then again who woulda thought that it could snow in cyber space? Talk about improbable! And last night it snowed in A-TX too! Yay!

snow

The fun part about dating a teacher is that snow days have the same magic as they did when we were kids and snow days here in Austin don’t even have to be that snowy for the powers that be to shut the city down. So we were giddy last night and bummed this morning. Oh well. It was still nice. We’d spent the evening eating the nutmeggy custard pie that Cha Cha brought back from Houston (cause they’re my favorite, like eggnog as pie) and watching a Disney Christmas movie about Santa losing his weather robot which a couple kids then get a hold of — antics and an LA blizzard ensue. Yes, I must confess a wicked fetish for dorky Christmas movies. The Robot Boy tapes every schlocky one he can find on Lifetime or Hallmark and he’ll say “Here, I taped some porn for you” and my frown turns upside down when I find out that it’s about Santa’s daughter falling in love beneath a magic sprig of mistletoe. Oh oh oh yes yes yes ooooooooooo yes. Sigh of delight. At about 11pm Cha yawned and bundled up in her cutie pie coat. I kissed her sweet cheeks and made her promise to drive careful but she was back in a flash…

“It’s snowing!”

“It’s snowing?”

“It’s snowing!”

We stood on my porch in awe of the flurries and feeling sentimental. Shortly after we first met, years ago, I threw a valentine-making party that was made gorgously memorable by unplanned party games like snow ball fights and snow angels. Cha Cha wrapped her arms around me and we hugged in the falling snow. Awwww. I sure do love my Cha.

There wasn’t enough snow to build a fat Frosty but had we been warmer and less lazy we could’ve constructed a Samurai Robot like this one. How great is that? Whoever built a Samurai Robot is one cool mo-fo! One cold snow-fo! Fo sho!

snow-samurai

Austin’s mercurial weather never ceases to amaze me! Just last week my backyard was  a fall fantasy like a Carolina Hardagree painting  and today it was snow. This weekend? In the 70’s. Nutty. Chestnutty. Well Santa, thanks for the snow. As improbable as it seems, I must be on the nice list.  I may be naughty but I have loads of Christmas spirit!

 

Egg custard -- a christmasy concoction!

Egg custard -- a christmasy concoction!

Cha got my pie from Houston’s “House of Pies” but we’re gonna try our hands at making our own someday. Here’s a promising recipe if you wanna try your hand at eggnog you can bite into. Yum yum.

Egg Custard Pie

Ingredients:

  • 4 large eggs, lightly beaten
  • 1/2 cup granulated sugar
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 2 1/2 cups milk
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla
  • grated nutmeg
  • pastry for 1 crust

Preparation:

Add sugar and salt to lightly beaten eggs; add milk and vanilla; mix to combine thoroughly. Pour into unbaked pie shell; sprinkle generously with nutmeg. Bake at 425° for 25 to 35 minutes, or until knife inserted in center comes out clean.

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