Archive for dorky

Today’s Secret Word is “Barfday”

Posted in Art Lover, Dork Alert, Goof & Glamour, I Heart Funny Fellas, In Celebration of the Absurd, Star F*#ker, Style & Fashion, Technicolor Pop, Top 2% of Coolest Mofos, TV, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 28, 2010 by alphabetfiend

Happy Freakin’ Barfday, Peewee!

Hooray! It’s Peewee Herman’s birthday! Don’t know how old he is, don’t care. It hardly matters. Peewee’s oddly timeless.

I adore Peewee Herman and count him among the top 2 % coolest mofos (of the magical sort) on planet Earth.

I worship the H*Man. So I was damn sure gonna celebrate his birthday with sacred acts of tom-foolery. To keep my play pure, I’d —  of course! — avoid all adult responsibilities while evading mind-numbing normals.

I’d planned an ambitious day of play;  loll about on chatty chairs, ram things with my shiny pink bicycle. (A virtual valentine of a bike!) 

I was gonna cater to the id.

But I couldn’t let the day pass without wishing Herman a happy Barfday.

Barfday?

AAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!

I meant to say that! Barf barf barf day!

Happy Barfday, Mr. Peeee-weee… happy barfday to you.

Hope the day was good to you.

Hope the playhouse is over-flowing with cake, frosting, bows, balloons, jewels, cash, pills. And, of course, psychedelic butterflies with google eyes who’ll quickly morph — as needed — into bowties. So many dandy-fop bowties! In a neon rainbow of hues!

Hope Capt. Carl & Cowboy Curtis treated you to a tequila shot or two.

Hope Miss Yvonne spoiled you with a “gentleman’s choice” — whatever that means.

Hope your birthday (so far) has been really freakin’ cool.

Psst.

Today’s secret word is “barfday.”

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Yes, I was including wordpress among adult activities, what of it?

*The cubist Hermans are by Tommervick, whose modern take on cubism has reconfigured everyone from Elvis to Mr. Rogers. Spock too. I swear.

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Let It Snow Some Mo!

Posted in I Heart Holidays with tags , , , , , on December 11, 2008 by alphabetfiend

I’m still just giddy over Austin’s rare snowfall. What a Christmasy treat. Like Egg Custard Pie.

In honor of topsy-turvy goodness like eggnog that’s bitten not chugged or snow in Austin, I give you this great ukulele Christmas carol. So grab your uke and join us in song!

If you don’t have a uke but you DO have some extra time on your hands, why not do a litle DIY and build you a hula strummer? Just imagine, you’ll be the life of the party at next year’s Xmas parties. Maybe you can make them into XXXmas parties: pile your neck with leis and see if chicks’ll show you their boobs in exchange for neon plastic blossoms. Plus you can participate in bitchin’ events like this poster advertises. How fun! The Uke! It’s the new banjo! (Wink wink .Werd.)

uke_out_poster4x6

 

Let it Snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!

Oh the weather outside is frightful
But the fire is so delightful
And since we’ve no place to go
Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!
It doesn’t show signs of stopping
And I’ve bought some corn for popping
The lights are turned way down low
Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!

When we finally kiss goodnight
How I’ll hate going out in the storm!
But if you’ll really hold me tight
All the way home I’ll be warm

The fire is slowly dying
And, my dear, we’re still goodbying
But as long as you love me so
Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!

When we finally kiss goodnight
How I’ll hate going out in the storm!
But if you’ll really hold me tight
All the way home I’ll be warm.

The fire is slowly dying
And, my dear, we’re still goodbying
But as long as you love me so
Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow…!

Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!

Posted in Dork Alert, I Heart Friends, I Heart Holidays, I Heart My Love-Tribe with tags , , , , , , , on December 11, 2008 by alphabetfiend
Ever since it started snowing on wordpress my heart has been aching for some real white stuff.  Being that I now live in Austin, Texas my wish for some Christmasy powder was rather improbable. But then again who woulda thought that it could snow in cyber space? Talk about improbable! And last night it snowed in A-TX too! Yay!

snow

The fun part about dating a teacher is that snow days have the same magic as they did when we were kids and snow days here in Austin don’t even have to be that snowy for the powers that be to shut the city down. So we were giddy last night and bummed this morning. Oh well. It was still nice. We’d spent the evening eating the nutmeggy custard pie that Cha Cha brought back from Houston (cause they’re my favorite, like eggnog as pie) and watching a Disney Christmas movie about Santa losing his weather robot which a couple kids then get a hold of — antics and an LA blizzard ensue. Yes, I must confess a wicked fetish for dorky Christmas movies. The Robot Boy tapes every schlocky one he can find on Lifetime or Hallmark and he’ll say “Here, I taped some porn for you” and my frown turns upside down when I find out that it’s about Santa’s daughter falling in love beneath a magic sprig of mistletoe. Oh oh oh yes yes yes ooooooooooo yes. Sigh of delight. At about 11pm Cha yawned and bundled up in her cutie pie coat. I kissed her sweet cheeks and made her promise to drive careful but she was back in a flash…

“It’s snowing!”

“It’s snowing?”

“It’s snowing!”

We stood on my porch in awe of the flurries and feeling sentimental. Shortly after we first met, years ago, I threw a valentine-making party that was made gorgously memorable by unplanned party games like snow ball fights and snow angels. Cha Cha wrapped her arms around me and we hugged in the falling snow. Awwww. I sure do love my Cha.

There wasn’t enough snow to build a fat Frosty but had we been warmer and less lazy we could’ve constructed a Samurai Robot like this one. How great is that? Whoever built a Samurai Robot is one cool mo-fo! One cold snow-fo! Fo sho!

snow-samurai

Austin’s mercurial weather never ceases to amaze me! Just last week my backyard was  a fall fantasy like a Carolina Hardagree painting  and today it was snow. This weekend? In the 70’s. Nutty. Chestnutty. Well Santa, thanks for the snow. As improbable as it seems, I must be on the nice list.  I may be naughty but I have loads of Christmas spirit!

 

Egg custard -- a christmasy concoction!

Egg custard -- a christmasy concoction!

Cha got my pie from Houston’s “House of Pies” but we’re gonna try our hands at making our own someday. Here’s a promising recipe if you wanna try your hand at eggnog you can bite into. Yum yum.

Egg Custard Pie

Ingredients:

  • 4 large eggs, lightly beaten
  • 1/2 cup granulated sugar
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 2 1/2 cups milk
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla
  • grated nutmeg
  • pastry for 1 crust

Preparation:

Add sugar and salt to lightly beaten eggs; add milk and vanilla; mix to combine thoroughly. Pour into unbaked pie shell; sprinkle generously with nutmeg. Bake at 425° for 25 to 35 minutes, or until knife inserted in center comes out clean.

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