Archive for gay marriage

Mad Men Sexpot Gets Wooly for ETSY

Posted in I like big butts & I can not lie, Style & Fashion, Technicolor Pop with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 21, 2010 by alphabetfiend
If that luminous hottie on ETSY looks like steamy actress Christina Hendricks, that’s because she is Christina Hendricks.
 
 
FYI, to those men-folk among you with a nose for anything “Christina Hendricks”, but not much else, ETSY is the web phenom known to crafters as the place to sell one’s handmade wares. For fashionistas with a taste for the unique, ETSY is the # 1 go-to for a find that wasn’t cranked out in a factory.
 
 
 
Blackbird Design House hawked handmade scarves via ETSY, using Hendricks as model. You may be asking, “How can I get Hendrick’s to model my DIY?”
 
Answer: Tamara Mello, the gal behind the knitting needles, is a Hendrick’s pal.
 
The cozies looked sublime on Christina. Her milk-white skin was the perfect backdrop for some chunky, funky stitches.
 
 
 
Wrapped in lambsy fluff, her creamy throat looked lush.
And mm-mmm her smokin’ curves looked plush.
 
 
It warms the cockles of my heart that the emmy-nominated Hendricks, who plays Mad Men’s voluptuous working girl Joan Holloway, posed in the wooly wears for a friend. What a stand up gal!
 
 
 
It’s just like I always say, “It’s good to have gorgeous and generous gal-pals!”
 
Tamara Mello?
Tamara Mello’s name may sound familiar to hardcore fans of television mastermind Ryan Murphy.
 
Murphy — the man behind Fox’s famous “Glee” and FX’s “Nip Tuck”) may recall a WB show from way back called “Popular.”  Tamara Mello played petite & punky Lily Esposito, the sassy latina.
 
 
 
Also on “Popular”: Tammy Lynn Michaels, who recently refused to be bullied into break-up silence by her ex Melissa Etheridge, with whom she shares children.
 
For Murphy enthusiasts, “Popular” is worth watching on DVD. “Popular” is a “Glee” precursor where-in Murphy worked out some of the kinks in the teen-drama genre, and maybe some of his own teen angst. Fans of Murphy as an artist working in the medium of television will get a glimpse into the writer,creator and director’s creative process. Fans of “Glee” will see the progression of that idea in the days before anyone thought we were ready for weekly song and dance on TV. 
 
 
In addition to her shibori dyed scarves, Mello also makes felted trays and nesting baskets for her company Blackbird Design House. Hendrick’s did Mello a hell of a friendly favor. Hype hype hooray! People are emptying  their pockets while they gawk. Those rosy cheeks, that pouty pucker. It’s no wonder Mello’s knits have been selling out quick.
 
 
But my favorite, the one that falls like a bodice of snow drift, is still available. Mmmmm. Hmmm. Can I really justify a 130$ scarf when I live in sunny Austin?  Well, it was once on the delicious nape of a zaftig goddess, which is my very favorite kind of deity.
 
Do you s’pose osmosis works with pretty? Yummy? Supernaturally sexy?
 
If I drop the bucks will I drop dead gorgeous? 
 
*Technicolor Pop (aka Alphabetfiend aka…) is a slave to fashion with a  television vice; based in Austin, Texas.*
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Back Together! Sarah Silverman & Jimmy Kimmel Hug/Hump It Out

Posted in Feminism (Shades of Gray), Friendship, I Heart Funny Femmes, I Heart My Love-Tribe, Romance & Relationships, Sex & XXX, TV with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 9, 2008 by alphabetfiend

“Super freak, super freak. That girl’s a super freak. Ohhhhh. She’s a very kinky girl. The kind you don’t take home to mother. She will never let your spirits down. Once you get her off the street, ow girl.”  — Rick James, bitch!

Looks like Sarah Silverman & Jimmy Kimmel are back on. Thank Goof! I don’t normally give a shite about the trials and tribulations of celebrity couples but I loved this pair. They were my Brad & Angelina. Except, y’know, totally gross.

head over heels in love?

head over heels in love?

Ah, when two freaks find each other… makes my heart go pitter pat. When wierdos wed, I break out my silk hankie and weep at the cosmic wonder of the world. So I was (dare I say it?) devastated when I heard that Jimmy Kimmel & Sarah Silverman had separated. I kicked them out of the freak museum and cast them as fools. The break was reportedly mutual but a sad Silverman on TMZ begged differently. Was Kimmel was the only fool in this snafu? Fool! Fool! Fucker! Fatso! I hate you Jimmy Kimmel! Then I read in US that while dining with a friend, Sarah

“grew somber and became enthralled in a heart-to-heart conversation with her pal. She was talking and it looked like he was listening and then advising her. Mutual friend Jonah Hill – who has appeared in comedy skits on Kimmel’s ABC show – was dining in the restaurant and also stopped by to say hello. Jonah’s appearance definitely had an effect on her. They spoke for just a minute. And after he left, Sarah looked momentarily pensive.”

I wanted to spit a loogy in Kimmel’s squinty eyes. My hate surged when Silverman won an Emmy for the “I’m Fucking Matt Damon”video which, ironically, was a 5 year anniversary gift for Kimmel. While accepting the  award, Silverman said

“Thanks to the person for whom this whole video was made: Jimmy Kimmel, who broke my heart – ohh, who’ll always have a place in my heart.” 

Big fat juicy tears welled up in my eyes. Maybe I wasn’t the only one? The Enquirer claimed that Jimmy was making beg-some blotto phonecalls and now, a month later, the pair’s been spotted pawing each other. No one’s officially copped to it (although Kimmel copped a feel in front of photogs.) Barbara Walters tried to worm it out of Silverman on “The View” but Silverman sweetly deflected,

“In total respect to you and your legendness, I do not feel beholden or compelled to define my personal relationship to you. It’s not like a big drama thing. We’re just not, like, defining it. We’re just being right now. Is that Okaaay?”

Yes! It’s OK. It’s more than OK. It’s a beauteous thing. But if there’s gonna be any more heart break, it better be Kimmel’s. Next time Silverman better fuck Matt Damon for reals! Except she doesn’t want Matt Damon, she wants Jimmy. Silverman (who describes herself as “a 13 year old boy”) once said of their romance,

“We really, really, really like each other.”

Silverman hasn’t always felt that way. On the occasion of their 2001 meeting at a Comedy Central roast of Playboy’s patriarch Hugh Hefner, Silverman said of Roastmaster Kimmel,

“Jimmy Kimmel, everyone. He’s fat and has no charisma. Watch your back, Danny Aiello .”

And Kimmel hasn’t always been such an ingrate, saying of his bawdy belle,

“Sarah is funny and smart and good to look at. Plus, she likes fat guys. What more could I ask?”

I was gonna hate Jimmy Kimmel forever if he didn’t wise up and win back his lunatic ladylove. Hopefully he realized that he’ll never find a cutie more suitable a soul mate than Sarah Silverman. I wasn’t a Kimmel-fan before he dated Silverman (who I adore like a best friend who asks you at 3am if you could please go digging around in her cooch cause she’s sure she lost a tampon up there somewhere.) Although, like Sarah, I love a man with with a big belly laugh and the belly to go with. It was Kimmel’s ability to attract Silverman and the things she said of him that made me a fan. So shoot me already for even giving a damn. I usually shrug at celebrity fray so how did I get into such a huff over Hollywood fluff?  They’re too freaky-deeky to be fluff. After five funny years, I was hooked on the dynamic duo. Maybe I’m star-farked and dumb but I’m not the only one.  

The Evil Beet blogged, “After breaking all our hearts by splitting up, it looks like Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel are back in each other’s hearts and pants. As much as I hate Jimmy Kimmel, this is kind of heart warming. You just hate to see true love broken apart.”

To which someone commented,”Disclaimer: I kind of hate them both. That said, YIPPEE! I am so relieved! I don’t know why their breakup totally bugged me, but it did.”

The Superficial rejoiced, “Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel have reunited after getting chased out of their respective villages with torches.”

See! It’s not just me! I’m not the only auntie who wants those two love birds to build a nice nest. (Silverman has stated publicly that she won’t marry until gay marriage is legalized. Yay!) More aptly, I’m one half – the pretty half – of my own perverted partnership and I can’t help but crave a double date with those two. We could get kicked out of yacht clubs together! Pose for inebriated photos! Sarah and I could share lipstick in the ladies room and then maybe a few french kisses which we’d later blame on our drunkenness. We could go bowling or get stoned. Pig out and then lay around on Turkish floor pillows, listen to a few records and fart.

Funny thing: the pair we usually pal around with — Peaches Peltz and the Prof –have often been subjected to my sage advice:

“You two freaks need to stick together! ‘Til Freakdom Cum! Ain’t nobody gonna get either of youse. No one else’d get the joke.”

 

These two freaks need to stick together!

Hold on tight, freaks!

So it brings me pervy peace to hear that Silverman & Kimmel are back in one another’s hairy arms. Wallowing in one another’s hilarious hearts. They’re a kooky, brave, insanely irreverent pair. And adorable. And sexy! So sexy. I once watched as some A-list blonde used her guest spot on “The Jimmy Kimmel Show” to recount a Sundance Film Fest story about staying in an adjoining hotel room to the raunchy couple. Who, in true form, spent the trip engaged in all manner of loud naughtiness. Nice. 

An interviewer once asked Silverman if she had a pet name for Kimmel’s Penis. Sarah cooed, “I just call it HOME.”

Awwwww.

Welcome home, Sarah. Surely you’ve been sorely missed.

“That girl is pretty wild now. The girl’s a super freak. The kind of girl you read about in new-wave magazine. That girl is pretty kinky, she’s a super freak, super freak, she’s super-freaky, yow. Super freak, super freak. She’s a very special girl. The kind of girl you want to know. From her head down to her toenails” 

******************************************* 

Alphabetfiend is Dia VanGunten — A-TX writer girl who loves a super freak. Take’s one to love one. Right, Daddy? You’ve been gone too long. I miss you like hell. It’s thanks to you that I recognize the beauty in a beasty freak. You were so right. If you meet a member of your tribe, hold on. Don’t lose sight. Us freaks need to stick together. Maybe you can send that wisdom via some ghosty means to these two kids or else I fear they’ll be lonely forever. Oh, lonely. I’m so lonely for you. October 9. The worst day ever. But today’s OK, I guess. I wrote this for you. Did ya see the part about getting tossed out of the yacht club? Wink wink. I love you, you handsome devil!

Lori Gottlieb’s Shot Gun Wedding: She says Settle, I say “I Do” to Love

Posted in Feminism (Shades of Gray), Friendship, Hooray for Choice!, I Heart My Love-Tribe, Intuition & Gut Intelligence, Psyche & Sexuality, Romance, Romance & Relationships with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 7, 2008 by alphabetfiend

 

A friend of mine was bummed after discovering an article in the Atlantic that urged women to settle. She emailed it to me with a one-word message: “depressing.” After reading the tedious thing, I didn’t feel depressed so much as annoyed. The writer Lori Gottlieb might as well be holding a shotgun to women’s heads and shoving them towards the unsuitable mate that awaits them at the altar.  She thinks she knows what we all want and need.

“Ask any soul-baring 40-year-old single heterosexual woman what she most longs for in life. Most likely, she’ll say that what she really wants is a husband (and, by extension, a child). To the outside world, of course, we still call ourselves feminists and insist—vehemently, even—that we’re independent and self-sufficient and don’t believe in any of that damsel-in-distress stuff, but in reality, we aren’t fish who can do without a bicycle, we’re women who want a traditional family. Every woman I know—no matter how successful and ambitious, how financially and emotionally secure—feels panic, occasionally coupled with desperation, if she hits 30 and finds herself unmarried. Oh, I know—I’m guessing there are single 30-year-old women reading this right now who will be writing letters to the editor to say that the women I know aren’t widely representative, that I’ve been co-opted by the cult of the feminist backlash, and basically, that I have no idea what I’m talking about. And all I can say is, if you say you’re not worried, either you’re in denial or you’re lying.”
What a presumptuous A-hole. “If you’re not worried, get worried. If you’re happy where you’re at, you’re a filthy liar.” Here it comes: YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT. Obviously Ms. Gottlieb wishes she were a Missus who’d made different choices. That’s cool. It’s her right to assess her own life. But, if she’s made such a mess of things, should she really be giving the rest of us advice?
“My advice is this: Settle! That’s right. Don’t worry about passion or intense connection. Don’t nix a guy based on his annoying habit of yelling “Bravo!” in movie theaters. Overlook his halitosis or abysmal sense of aesthetics. Because if you want to have the infrastructure in place to have a family, settling is the way to go.”
I, for one, don’t want to be saddled with someone whose breath curdles. And a fella with no taste, no thanks. I’m a voluptuary who would be desolate if stuck with a man who couldn’t appreciate the gorgeous shoes on my feet — satin peeptoe wedges, the satin printed with swirling fishes. Who didn’t even notice as I ooed & ahhed over them.  Who wouldn’t then secretly order them and present them to me on my birthday with a card that read “Shoes for the mermaid who walks on land.” This man exists. But had I married previous suitors, what then?

“Those of us who choose not to settle in hopes of finding a soul mate later are almost like teenagers who believe they’re invulnerable to dying in a drunk-driving accident. We lose sight of our mortality. We forget that we, too, will age and become less alluring. Which is all the more reason to settle before settling is no longer an option.”

No wonder she gave my friend the blues. Frankly, it pisses me off. I want to grab my friend by her luscious shoulders and shake the shit outta her. Don’t listen to the fear-monger egg-hoarder Lori Gottlieb. Her creepy advice is misguided at best and dangerous at worst.

“By 40, if you get a cold shiver down your spine at the thought of embracing a certain guy, but you enjoy his company… is that settling or making an adult compromise?”

If my friend came home from a date and said “Yea, I enjoyed his company but then when he hugged me, I got the cold chills, whaddaya think?”  RUN!  Pump them knees, change your number, block his emails. Too often women ignore their guts out of misguided politeness or because they think they are being “shallow” when really their body is trying to tell them that something is veryy wrong. Maybe the guy’s a misogynist rapist or maybe he’s just a really bad match genetically. Or spiritually. We are animals with animal instincts/signals.

  1. Another friend had a guy pal who she wanted to dig. “He’s so kind and he really likes me, ” she’d say. One night she woke up in a ice cold sweat with a stomach full of stones to find him in bed with her. After months and numerous apologies, she finally gave in to his advances. He turned out to be a cruel bastard and a cheat. I was about to say “Your tummy told you so” when she burst out crying, “That night, my skin was crawling, I wanted to puke, I knew who he was. I always knew.”
  2. When my mom was a young reckless hitchhiker she accepted a ride from a guy who was handsome and charming. She settled into his V-Dub Bug and they began to chat congenially. She was thinking “What a nice guy,” when suddenly her whole body revolted against that thought.  She bailed but years later she saw a photo in the newspaper and recognized the handsome face. He was the infamous serial killer Ted Bundy. If my mom hadn’t listened to her inner-alarm, I wouldn’t even be here.
  3. I resisted the friendship of a girl who I found annoying and “ugly.” Her presense agitated me, her voice made my skin crawl. I struggled with immense guilt, grossed out by my own unkindness. When I yielded to her pursuit, things quickly spiraled into a terrifying single-white-female situation. Even in friendship, it’s a mistake to settle.

Lori Gottlieb’s advice is reckless and reeks of desperation. Don’t listen to her, listen to yourself. Don’t listen to your guilt, listen to your gut. This is the real world, with real dangers. It’s not an episode of “Friends.”

“And while Rachel and her supposed soul mate, Ross, finally get together (for the umpteenth time) in the finale of Friends, do we feel confident that she’ll be happier with Ross than she would have been had she settled down with Barry, the orthodontist, 10 years earlier?”

Rachael did lots of growing and changing in those ten years. And wasn’t Barry a total creepoid? Didn’t he pull some real skeezy stuff? I seem to recall something about Barry getting married but still trying to get into Rachael’s pants and then some weird vengeful ick at his own wedding right in front of the woman he was settling for. Which is the problem with settling. It’s not a good deal no matter how you look at it, for any of the parties involved.

It’s equally questionable whether Sex and the City’s Carrie Bradshaw, who cheated on her kindhearted and generous boyfriend, Aidan, only to end up with the more exciting but self-absorbed Mr. Big, will be better off. (Some time after the breakup, when Carrie ran into Aidan on the street, he was carrying his infant in a Baby Björn. Can anyone imagine Mr. Big walking around with a Björn?)

Aidan’s lucky Carrie didn’t settle. He wanted something else and he got it. Good for him. As for Carrie, it’s hard to say. Big did leave her at the altar but Carrie still chooses to deal with Big’s damage. For better or for worse. Carrie may not even want kids, in which case Big is a much better choice than Aidan ever was. Whose to say that even if Carrie had married Aidan that he wouldn’t have still gone on to fall in love with that baby-mama? Settling is strewn with sticky wickets.

“I’ll likely need to settle for someone who is settling for me…. My friend Alan justified his choice of a ‘bland’ wife with whom he shares little connection this way: ‘I think one-stop shopping is overrated. I get passion at my office with my work, or with my friends that I sometimes call or chat with—it’s not the same, and, boy, it would be exciting to have it with my spouse. But I spend more time with people at my office than I do with my spouse.”

Who want’s to be weighed down by someone who has “settled” for you and who shares more passion and spends more time with people at the office? What about that is “family friendly”? Let’s raise up some damaged kids who someday someone will settle for. The guy who gives you the shivers, with whom there is no sexual connection, maybe you will look back one day and say “Is it any wonder?” But it will be too late then. He’ll have already raped your daughter in her little girl gingham bedroom. From the time she was 5 ’til he she ran away and joined a cult at 15.  Sure, you want a partner in parenthood, but is the wrong partner better than none at all? How many childhoods have been shattered because selfish mothers believed a bad man was better than no man?  

“They, like me, would rather feel alone in a marriage than actually be alone. In practice, my married friends with kids don’t spend that much time with their husbands anyway, and in many cases, their biggest complaint seems to be that they never see each other. So if you rarely see your husband—but he’s a decent guy who takes out the trash and sets up the baby gear —how much does it matter whether the guy you marry is The One?

If you never see your husband and if what you know about him is “he’s a decent guy who takes out the trash” then what the hell is he doing in your home with your kids? Are you sure he’s a such a decent guy? Ask your daughter. She might know a lot more about him than you do. Ask your doctor when you go for that HIV test because if you’re not blowing him, who is?

In my formative years, romance was John Cusack and Ione Skye in Say Anything. But when I think about marriage nowadays, my role models are the television characters Will and Grace, who, though Will was gay and his relationship with Grace was platonic, were one of the most romantic couples I can think of. So what if Will and Grace weren’t having sex with each other? How many long- married couples are having much sex anyway?

If Grace had decided to spend her life with Will and raise a few kids, I’d say what I always say, “Hooray for Choice!”  Grace knows Will inside out. He’s a good person with a lot of love to give. And who says a family has to be what it’s always been? Lori Gottlieb says so. She’s not saying “grab a pal, raise some kids, be happy.” She’s holding a shotgun to your temple and saying “Settle. Or Else.” Will and Grace almost went that route, they came very close, but then they got swept up in romance and raised kids with their honey-pies. Either ending is acceptable. Hooray for choice! Goof love it. But Gottlieb says, “Don’t be choosy.” 

Screw that, I’m as choosy as it gets, I’m a modern girl that way. Over time I realized I was too much of an exhibitionist Ham to be with a jealous man, too wary to be with a sheltered mama’s boy, too liquid to be with a man who wanted to box me in (I leaked through the cracks and defied definition.) Eventually I met a man in the Laundromat. A punk rock Robot genius with a heart of gold. His take on this: “I used to wonder about you all the time but I never thought you actually existed. I thought I’d wait forever but I was waiting.” The vision he had of me defied all logic, where was that wierdo anyway? And then, one day, there I was — with 16 overflowing laundry baskets stuffed to the gills with silky bits — and wearing a vintage 1970’s Prostitutes Union t-shirt. He’d been waiting for me… so he was single. And I’d been picky… so I was able to pick him right out. You look really familiar. Don’t I know you from somewhere? 

Problem with your shotgun wedding is that someone's liable to end up a bloody mess.

Problem with your shotgun wedding is it's liable to end up a bloody mess.

Bitch, if you don’t get that shotgun out of my friend’s unbearably beautiful face, I’m gonna wrest it away and shoot you with it. Now Go. Go. And don’t come around here no more. Bang bang.

 Alphabetfiend is a writer & a prime choice luxury cut. Eat that!

W.W.A.M.D? Tina Fey’s Palin “Not afraid to get mavericky.”

Posted in I Heart Funny Femmes, politics, Sex & XXX, TV with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 5, 2008 by alphabetfiend

W.W.A.M.D?

What Would a Maverick Do?

Tina Fey — a sparkle in the dark midnight. Again.  Finally someone mentioned Palin’s “I tolerate the gays” crap! That yuck has been a pebble in my shoe for days. Done beautifully, of course. Queen Latifah as Gwen Ifill. I need a “W.W.A.M.D?” bracelet like 10 minutes ago. If I wasn’t so lazy I’d start screening t-shirts. You MUST watch it for yourself. And even if you caught SNL you should give it another go because (while attempting to post the NBC clip, and failing) I laughed at different things every time. I was able to post it on myspace however. Here are some highlights, word for delicious word.  Didn’t I say that Tina Fey would shed some light?

Tina Fey illuminates....

Tina Fey illuminates....

           For starters…

  • Can I call you Joe? OK. Cause I practiced a few zingers where I called you Joe.
  • I love John McCain. He’s one of my dearest friends. but at the same time he’s also dangerously unbalanced. I mean let’s be frank, John McCain, and again this is a man I would take a bullet for, is bad at his job and mentally unstable. As my mother would say, God love him but he’s a raging maniac. And a dear dear friend. 

          When asked about the financial crisis:

  • Y’know John McCain and I, we’re a couple of mavericks and gosh darnitt, we’re gonna take that maverick energy right to Washington and we’re gonna use it to fix this financial crisis and everything else that plagues this great country of ours.

          How will you solve the financial crisis being a maverick?

  • Y’know we’re gonna take every aspect of the crisis and look at it and then we’re gonna ask ourselves what would a maverick do in this situation and then y’know we’ll do that.
  • John McCain voted against Wall Street regulations 41 times. Let me repeat that. 41 times. And again this is a man I love. If I had to spend the rest of my life stranded on a desert island with only one other person it would be John McCain. No doubt about it. I mean you should see my face light up when he walks into a room.

          Insiders & Outsiders:

  • Also too you see I think a little differently from an insider. I don’t think it’s patriotic to pay more taxes. I don’t think it’s patriotic to criticize these wars we got goin’ on. I do think it’s patriotic to tell the government ‘hey, get outta my way, stop tryin’ to impose on my right to shoot wolves from a helicopter.”
  • I come from Scranton Pennsylvania and that’s as hard-scrabble a place as you’re ever gonna find. It’s a hell hole. An absolute jerkwater of a town. it’s just an awful awful sad place filled with sad desperate people. Nobody and I mean nobody but me has ever come outta that place. It’s a genetic cesspool. So don’t be telling me that I’m part of the Washington elite cause I come from the absolute WORST place on earth.  Scranton Pennsylvania.  And Wilmington Delawares not much better.

          On global warming:

  • We don’t know if this climate change whoozie whatzie is man made or if it’s just a natural part of the end of days. But I’m not gonna talk about that. I would like to talk about taxes. Because with Barrack Obama yer gonna be paying higher taxes. But not with me and my fellow maverick. We are not afraid to get mavericky in there and ruffle feathers and not got to allow that and also too, the great Ronald Reagan.

          On same-sex marriage:

  • In an Obama-Biden administration same sex couples would be given the same property rights, rights to insurance and rights of ownership as heterosexual couples. There will be no distinction.

           So to clarify, do you support gay marriage?

  • Absolutely not. But I do think they should be allowed to visit one another in the hospital and in a lot of ways that’s just as good if not better.
  • Y’know I would be afraid of where that would lead. I believe marriage is meant to be a sacred institution between two unwilling teenagers. But don’t think I don’t tolerate gay people cause I do. I tolerate  them with all my heart.

          On Health care Regulation?

  • I’m gonna ignore that question. And instead talk about Israel. I love Israel so much. Bless its heart. There’s a special place for Israel in heaven. And I know some people are gonna say that I’m only saying that to pander to Florida voters but from a very young age my two greatest loves were always Jews and Cuban food.

           A now a chance to make a closing statement:

  • Oh, are we not doing the talent portion?
  • Sure there were moments when I wanted to say “Hey, this lady’s a dummy!” But I didn’t because Joe Biden is better than that. I repeat. Joe Biden is BETTER  than THAT.
  • I liked being here tonight answering these tough questions without the filter of the mainstream “gotcha!” media with their follow up questions, fact checking or incessant need to figure out what yer words mean or why you put them in that order. 
We should all repay Fey with sexual favors. It's the least we could do.

We should all repay Fey with sexual favors. It's the least we could do.

If Margaret Cho goes down on Sarah Palin, as she’s offered to do, then I’m so gonna suckle Tina Fey. Or if she’d prefer, she could totally do me with a strap-on. Whatever Tina Fey wants. She’s a sexy bitch… and plus, I feel like I owe her. No anal though. I don’t owe her that much.

Dr. Seuss Bible: Sunday AM Punk Rock Gospel Blog

Posted in Music & Life & Sundays, Spirituality & Religion, TV with tags , , , , , , , on October 5, 2008 by alphabetfiend

Thanks for popping in to this Sunday’s Punk Rock Gospel Blog. I meant to talk about love and gay marriage but was hoping to post the most beautiful wedding photo in the world and didn’t get permission in time. No one could see this photo and begrudge the gorgeous couple of their rights, their day, their love.  If they’re willing to share, it’lll be worth the wait.

Enjoy the Dr. Seuss Bible. We could all use a few giggles and some forgiving energy this week after the crazy stuff that’s been going on. The ignorance! The oppression! The crap.

I’d dig the Bible more if it was written (and illustrated) by Dr. Seuss.

Amen! What could be more goof-blessed than Seuss via Kids in the Hall? Goof abounds!

Have a great Sunday y’all. Take a breath, have a laugh.

Love.

Be the love.

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