Archive for nanowrimo

holy hell thank goof this nanowrimo is over!!!!!

Posted in Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense with tags , , , on December 1, 2008 by alphabetfiend

I’m fried & fretful.

I’m also done. Not with Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense but with nanowrimo. Yay!!!! And now to be in the dark with my migraine!

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Some time soon I’ll give you some actual ABC Fiend fun again. But first I must rest and then I must dress up in a pink vinyl stewerdess outfit and play “coffee tea or me?” with my patient Robot. And then…. I’ll be back.

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Blondie & Kermit Duet: Rainbow Connection (Sunday Punk Rock Gospel)

Posted in Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense, Sunday AM Punk Rock Gospel with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 24, 2008 by alphabetfiend

Lina and I were just talking last night about connections that happen in art without the artist’s awareness. The subconscious strings beads, the conscious wears a perty necklace. The knowing inside the oblivious. We both agreed that it’s our favorite part of making art. She with paint, me with words. I had one of these moments recently. The RobotBoy and I had a nice hazy smoke and broke into a mile-a-minute conversation about racism and homophobia. Big issues for both of us; life themes. I confessed to three brief moments of ingrained racism as a child, flashes where an adult’s fucked up toxic mindset had made its way into me and I had to then kick it out. But, I told RB, I’d never experienced a moment of prejudice about homosexuality and had this innate calm understanding of it for as long as I can remember. My mom always says it doesn’t surprise her that while not gay my life is a gay cabaret. She tells this story of me casually referring to a friend of mine as gay and she asked “Do you even know what that is?” and I told her in great detail without a hint of judgement. That kid, by the way, came out 15 years later. I do however have an attitude about gay people who are prejudice against themselves. That riles. On that thought I was led to tell a story about my aunt/cousin showing up in our living room and begging my Dad to save her from her terrible situation — she’d come home to find her husband wearing a mask with lipstick & eyeshadow, in a dress, being ass-farked by a man. Of course I was sitting there rapt, being the nosy and non-sheltered kid that I was. And of course my Dad helped her and of course she farked him over. He ended up having to evict her after she completely trashed the place he’d let her live. It took him weeks to clean it up and one day he parked a pick-up truck in the driveway that was over-flowing with ephemera from the lives of these kinky relatives. Being, again, the nosy and unsheltered kid that I was, I began to sift through it all with an archaeologist’s precision and he let me (even left it for days until I’d had my fill.) Was it the choice that most fathers would make? No. Was it the right choice for that kid who would eventually grow up to be writer-me? Hell yea! I poured over piles of love letters, deflated mylar balloons, teddy bears that were far too tainted for me to introduce to my stuffed animals and — Jackpot! — the creepy as hell translucent rubber mask with red lips and blue-shadow eyes. The fact that it had been taken with her to the new place and then abandoned with bears makes me think she was down with the kink and had played up her boo-hoo to win my father’s sympathies. Not that it didn’t suck to then be left for a man and cheated on and betrayed. I’m sure it hurt terribly, enough to abandon love letters in a house filled with cat turds. But that mask was not the trauma she claimed, that mask meant something to her though I’m not sure what. The mask was my trauma! No such thing will ever find its way into my boudoir and I’m the experimental dress up sort. OK, here’s where it gets kinda funny and little kid absurd. When I’d had my fill of voyeurism, the one thing I took away from the bed of that pick up was a 45 of Kermit the Frog singing “Rainbow Connection” (“It’s Not Easy Being Green” was the B side.)

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As a kid, I had to take my music where ever I could get it. My entire music collection was comprised of a few records pilfered from alley ways on trash day and Columbia House rejects from when my dad neglected to check “no thanks” on the little card that announced it would be sending him cassette tapes by Huey Lewis, Kenny Rogers or A-HA. Thus my eclectic musical sensibilities. I must’ve listened to that Kermit record 100’s of times over the years and still have it somewhere. I sang a few remembered lines for RB and he says “Never heard it.” Never heard it? The computer was on my lap because I’d been working on my book before getting carried away with smoke and talk, so we make our way to youtube and hit play. And then it hits me — my own personal RAINBOW CONNECTION. Here I am, taking a break from the book, chatting about totally unrelated things, and ending up right back at the damn book. In  Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense, one of the characters is a cop with “blue sense” who experiences psychic visions of a girl’s body trapped in a mine and the girl is wearing a jeweled rainbow around her neck. All of the characters are dealing with “knowing” and with the feeling that there is something more to be had, to be known. My characters and their maker/writer. The lovers, the dreamers and me! I did not recall the actual lyrics or think of “The Rainbow Connection” in relation to my book but connections were happening beneath the surface and I remembered every word some where. Kermit was poking at me no doubt.

RAINBOW CONNECTION
Kermit the Frog

Why are there so many
songs about rainbows
And what’s on the other side
Rainbow’s are visions
They’re only illusions
And rainbows have nothing to hide
So we’ve been told and some chose to
Believe it
But I know they’re wrong wait and see

Someday we’ll find it
The Rainbow Connection
The lovers, the dreamers and me

Who said that every wish
Would be heard and answered
When wished on the morning star
Somebody thought of that
And someone believed it
And look what it’s done so far
What’s so amazing
That keeps us star gazing
What so we think we might see

Someday we’ll find it
That Rainbow Connection
The lovers the dreamers and me

Have you been half asleep
And have you heard voices
I’ve heard them calling my name
Are these the sweet sounds that called
The young sailors
I think they’re one and the same
I’ve heard it too many times to ignore it
There’s something that I’m supposed to be

Someday we’ll find it
The Rainbow Connection
The lovers, the dreamers and me!

It’s the perfect Punk Rock Gospel for today because it has to do with the book and thus serves the gods of nanowrimo but is still a wonderful discussion of spirit and the search for something more. Plus Debbie Harry gives Kermie some punk rock props. Enjoy!

Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense — Chapter 7 DRAFT

Posted in Books & Writing, Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on November 14, 2008 by alphabetfiend

Chapter 7 has moved

http://puresweetchocolatesense.wordpress.com/2008/12/08/pure-sweet-chocolate-sense-chapter-7/

Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense (chapter 6, part one, DRAFT)

Posted in Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense with tags , , , , , , , on November 13, 2008 by alphabetfiend

Chapter Six has moved

http://puresweetchocolatesense.wordpress.com/2008/12/07/pure-sweet-chocolate-sense-chapter-six/

Dream About Flying — Sunday AM Punk Rock Gospel Blog

Posted in Sunday AM Punk Rock Gospel with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on November 10, 2008 by alphabetfiend

What I really SHOULD be talking about in this Punk Rock Gospel Blog is the total human rights catastrophe of Prop 8 which is breaking my heart with its backward BS. I never dreamed that sucker would pass. I’m sick about it. And I have a lot to say on the subject of gay marriage as a human rights issue. Which I why I just can’t do that today when I’m 6 days behind in my 50,000 word marathon, having committed to the nanowrimo challenge for National Novel Writing Month. So I have no room for those words, also I have a one-track mind. So I’m going to share this Alexi Murdoch song from the perspective of Marchella, one of the characters in Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense.

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Dear Venus —

Kept hitting replay today, listening to the song “Dream About Flying”…. I have this aching attachment to it that is off-putting. It’s as if it’s not for me. But it must be cause I’m all that I have. I listen to it and I feel the agony and frustration of a mustachioed stranger. I feel his searching and his hiding. How he opens his eyes to the ceiling and feels like futility will eat him alive. Maybe it’s because I’ve been there — I’ve been that man. Of course that must be it, some part of myself searching for me and not finding me. Trying so hard, so hard, so hard.  But I’m finally not hiding as much and hurting less. So maybe eventually that will bring that aching man that haunts my insides a little bit of peace.

Nutter alert:

Wouldn’t it be wildly wonderful if the man isn’t internal but external, meaning that he really exists out there and the reason he’s searching for me is because I’m his one true love? His peace is me, finding me. And my peace is being found. He’ll gather me up, my bones & my secrets, my hard parts gone soft in his arms, and I’ll rejoice in my organic nature, in my earthling body self b/c he’ll be — FINALLY — my soft place to fall. Not that I believe in all that hoodoo, psychic visions or soul mates but my romantic mood of late has my mind mushy and hopeful.

Oh, and go ahead and twitter all you blogosphere hipsters, cause yes I did get that “soft place to fall” from Dr. Phil — I admit it! But hey, the only reason you know that is because YOU’RE watching him too. Anyhoo. I wouldn’t mind having a little of what he and Robin have so I guess I’m not too cool for all that.

It is a great song. He sounds so much like Nick Drake! Posted the lyrics too. Watch the u-tube clip!

Looking for love, finding myself,

xoxo Marchessa

Dream About Flying

Pale light this morning
Woke me
Slow pain I feel
Will not let me be

So much work to do
I don’t know if I can
Trying so hard, so hard, so hard
But I’m just one man

Five years old I climbed up on the wall
My mother warned me but I took no heed
Like all creatures great and small
I took a fall and found out I could bleed

These days I’m afraid of everything
Suppose cause everything will die
Thought it was to love what they will lose
So much easier to lie

Sometimes I feel like I’m drowning
Actually it’s more like most of the time
But every now and then when I’m sleeping
I still have a dream that I’m flying

And I wake up crying

Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense — chapter 5 draft

Posted in Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense with tags , , , , , on November 9, 2008 by alphabetfiend

Chapter 5 has moved

http://puresweetchocolatesense.wordpress.com/2008/12/07/pure-sweet-chocolate-sense-chapter-five/

Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense (Chapter 3 + 4 Draft)

Posted in Pure Sweet Chocolate Sense with tags , , , , , , on November 8, 2008 by alphabetfiend

Chapter Three has moved to PSCS’s  own wordpress home

http://puresweetchocolatesense.wordpress.com/2008/12/07/pure-sweet-chocolate-sense-chapter-two-2/

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